My Answer

Recently I was asked to write a letter that would be included in an informational something or another for church planting wives-to-be. The question was - what is the role of a church planter's wife?

Dear Church Planting Wife,

What is the role of the church planter’s wife? Wouldn’t it be easier to list the things that our role is not? The list seems to be much shorter. You see, I believe that the church planting wife is one of the most challenging roles that could ever be imagined. We wear more hats than many ever dream. The good news is that the fruit of our labor makes the adventure worth all of the effort. So be brave. Stand tall. You are a woman of noble character and God is going to blow you away with the story he is getting ready to write of your life.

First of all, let’s get one thing straight. I am not a church PLANTER'S wife. I am a church PLANTING wife. I am not just the wife of the church planter. I am the wingman. The journey is mine just as much as it is my husbands'. I was called just as he was called to begin this church. To say I am a church planter's wife almost seems as if my role is less than that of my husband. It is not. . .not when you are starting a church from scratch. It's just different

I do not pastor the church. I watch the back of the one who does.

I do not make the decisions. I pray for the wisdom of the ones who do.

I do not play the piano or run the nursery. I keep my hands free so I can help out wherever I might be needed on a Sunday morning. And I do serve in the areas where I am truly passionate.

I do not come to church with the most beautiful Sunday attire. I come to church often in a pair of jeans, a t-shirt and flip flops. No doubt I will be on my hands and knees either loving on a snotty, crying child or sweeping up donut crumbs and spilled coffee from the school cafeteria floor.

I do not get jealous when other women need my husband's counsel. But, I do keep a very close tab on every situation. I talk with my husband about boundaries and guidelines that will help to protect our marriage and he allows me to check up on him and ask him tough questions
I do date my husband every single week. I do not let conversation turn towards church affairs during our date night (at least not very often).

I do run our home. I am a gymnastics/homeschool mom with a mini van. And I do everything that I can to make our home a place of refuge for our family and not a place of stress.
I do help to keep my husband well balanced. I try to make sure that he is always making time for the family and time for himself in the middle of the whirlwind of all God has called him to be.

I do open my house up to new families and friends. It is not always the most comfortable thing for me to do. I don't allow myself to feel guilty for that. I am an introvert by nature and the party is my most uncomfortable place to be. But I push myself to step out of my comfort zone more and more.

There are many more things that I do as a church planting wife. I plan and schedule and rearrange my schedule. I wear the big MOM hat 24/7. I give and take and mentor and remain flexible. I smile. I cry. I celebrate and admittedly sometimes I complain. I get tired. I laugh. I scream. I nurture the deep relationship with at least one godly lady who is not at all a part of our church. For I always end up needing a caring voice on the other end of the phone. And I watch in amazement at what God is doing.

But most of all, I take time to curl up in the lap of the Father as often as I possibly can. I believe this alone is the #1 role of the church planting wife. Forget all of the other do's and don'ts. If I fail to do the #1 thing. . .I drown. And believe me, drowning in the middle of starting a church is never where you want to be.

No doubt your hats will be different from mine. God’s story for your journey will look quite different in many ways. Embrace the uniqueness of where and what God has called you to do. Discover the place where you can meet with God and all of the rest of the world can melt away. Then make sure that you join him there regularly. That would be my heart’s wish for you as you begin the adventure.

Amy Colón
Cool River Church
Superior, Colorado

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I just got this book and read this letter! I loved it! Thank you. I am about to start this new adventure with my husband. I like how you say it's a team effort and everything you are and are not! Well said!